Building friendships outside the classroom

At school, friendships happen in short bursts: recess, lunch, the odd group task. It's busy, crowded and structured. School holidays offer something different: long, unhurried stretches where kids can really get to know each other.

That's why the holidays are often when friendships grow the most, and when parents can help without hovering.

Why friendships outside school matter

Friends are a big part of children's wellbeing. Kids with solid friendships tend to feel more confident, cope better with setbacks, and enjoy school more. Time together outside the classroom, without teachers, timetables or the whole year group watching, lets those friendships develop at their own pace.

Small groups beat big parties

Large gatherings are fun but don't build much depth. Two or three kids doing something together, a surf lesson, a cooking class, a morning at the rock pools, gives them space to talk, collaborate and actually connect.

Shared activities do the heavy lifting

Kids don't bond by sitting across from each other making conversation. They bond by doing things side by side: building, creating, competing, laughing at the same mistakes. A structured activity gives them a ready-made reason to work together, which is especially helpful for kids who find small talk hard.

Mix familiar faces with new ones

Booking an activity with one existing friend is a great way to meet others. With a buddy beside them, kids are much more open to chatting to someone new, and holiday programs often bring together children from different schools and suburbs.

Help them stay in touch

Holiday friendships can fade if they're left to chance. A follow-up playdate, a second activity together, or a quick catch-up at the park keeps the momentum going into the next term.

Connect with the parents too

Children's friendships are often shaped by whether their parents know each other. Swapping numbers at pick-up or sharing lifts makes the next catch-up much easier to organise, and you might make a friend yourself.

A few easy ideas

• Invite one friend to a holiday activity your child is already keen on.
• Follow up a great day with a casual park or beach catch-up.
• Ask your child who they'd like to see more of, and make one plan with that family.